April 2, 2020

Save Me

Tick tock

My time is ticking

My clock is slowing down

One day it is speeding up

And the next it is almost stopped

Almost.

Shaking constantly

Heart beating out of control

Mind swirling in endless thoughts

Eyes lost.

Fast moving

Quick, quick, quick

Faster, faster

Never enough, never good enough

Need to do more

Need to keep going

Keep working until you can’t work anymore

Keep working until there’s no more work to do

Keep working until your mind is distracted and the pain is temporarily gone

Just work until then, that’s all.

I feel myself drowing

Gulping water while thrashing my arms and legs, trying to find the surface

However I cannot

I can only tread in water for so long

If I can’t reach the surface soon, then what happens?

Where do I go? What do I do?

Scared to death but cannot speak

For no one would listen to the truth behind my words.

Save me from myself.

Please.